Senator Stevens: My plan to get the egg off your face.

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Don't waste your time trying to scarify Maria Cantwell and them Seattle voters

I couldn't find this as published previously on Washblog, unless it was in the old Washblog. Since the old windbag is back and madder than ever, I'm inviting him again to Bay Center.

Dear Senator Stevens,

Don't waste your time in Seattle trying to scarify them Democrats and Cantwell people.

I like your ideas and want to invite you to my house in Bay Center, Washington - right smack dab in the middle of Willapa Bay (that's South and West of Puget Sound if you go by dogsled Senator.)

What I want you to see is how badly we need a bridge from Bay Center to Tokeland so we don't have to drive 40 miles to get to a town that is less than five miles as the seagull flies.

If I agree to help support drilling in the Reserve up there in Alaska, can we here in Bay Center get in on the pork of your bridge to whereever and move some of that money to the Willapa? I know that's how politics work and am willing to offer my tit for your tat in helping you get what you want.

I'm willing to drop my support for forcing the oil company execs into taking an oath when they appear before your comittee - but I have to have something in return. A bridge from Bay Center to Tokeland gives your "Bridge to nowhere" money a more plausible and acceptable use of political pork. Sharing part of that $270 million could in fact make our bridge kind of a "sister project" to your bridge up there.

So come on, Senator!

Let's get politcally real. You don't have to stay embarrassed by uppity Democratic women senators.

You can make an end run right around Ms. Cantwell by using your vast authority, whining technique and favor-collection skills to do something good for another part of the wilderness.

I know that driving to Tokeland to have Friday night prime rib at the Shoalwater Casino will be more attractive if I can do in five minutes what used to take an hour.

And at the Casino I can spend money to help the tribe prosper, which of course creates income available for Abramoff to slink after and spend on you and your like-minded morally conscientious colleagues.

Everybody wins Senator ... except of course your arch-enemy who has proven more capable than you ... that little Harpy Cantwell.


Arthur Ruger
Bay Center Wa

Arthur Ruger 2006

Arthur & Lietta Ruger 2002-2008. The American Choice is a  political internet journal based in Bay Center, Washington. The views expressed not authored by Arthur or Lietta Ruger are the writers' own and do not necessarily reflect those of The American Choice or SwanDeer Productions. Permission of author required for reprinting original material, and only requests for reprinting a specific item are considered.